Dang Yin Yang

Here's the little explanation I pulled off the net before I give my theory:

In general, the Yin Yang symbol is a Chinese representation of the entire celestial phenomenon. It contains the cycle of Sun, four seasons, 24-Segment Chi, the foundation of the I-Ching and the Chinese calendar.

By rotating the Sun chart and positioning the Winter Solstice at the bottom, it will look like this . The light color area which indicates more sunlight is called Yang (Sun). The dark color area has less sunlight (more moonlight) and is called Yin (Moon). Yang is like man. Yin is like woman. Yang wouldn't grow without Yin. Yin couldn't give birth without Yang. Yin is born (begins) at Summer Solstice and Yang is born (begins) at Winter Solstice. Therefore one little circle Yin is marked on the Summer Solstice position. Another little circle Yang is marked on the Winter Solstice position. These two little circles look like two fish eyes.

And here's my take on it. In life we seek out balance. This is why opposites often attract. My husband and I are opposites in many ways. We balance eachother. Where I am weak, he is strong. When he is reactive, I am calm. He is refractory and I show patience. He is good with directions and numbers, and I am lost. I have book sense and he has common sense. I prefer freedom and he, responsibility of course. But there is one place in our lives that we cannot balance, and it is not for lack of trying.

It is positivity and negativity. I look for the silver lining. My glass is half-full and something good comes of each mistake. When one door shuts a window opens. You get the picture. But with him the littlest things can get the best of him. His glass is half-empty and damnit look at that it's not clean either. To teach the kids not to yell, he yells. He has learned to expect the worst so when it doesn't happen he feels pleasantly surprised.

I can in no way force him to think positively. It is an outlook on life that develops from every experience. It's shaped by our parents, our teachers, the books we read. Whether our first love went well or smashed our heart to pieces. It's in rejection hugely. It's in friendship and commitment. How much you are willing to sacrifice to get something. How our heart has handled all these things like sickness and death but also hope and bringing children into the world. Even small things can make me happy like coffee and freshly-washed babies' hair. A check in the mail or an e-mail from a close friend. Those can erase even HUGE negatives for me. But he can't for a second impose me into a negativity. I just won't do it!

Day in and day out I must try my damndest to continue to look on the bright side of things while my husband brings up that the pipe under the sink is leaking or that the AC stopped working again. Or that he needs some white socks. "Of course you do" I say as I fill the washer. And it really wears on me. He must find happiness in something and draw on it. I find myself telling him often that "Things really aren't so bad, look what we DO have."

I am convinced that Yin and Yang represent all things in balance except positivity and negativity because they were not made to coexist. They cannot live happily side by side pretending that it does not matter. One will wear and grate on the other until a general state of uneasiness occurs. It is then one will be forced to take more drastic measures to rid itself of the other.