Aches of the Ages

Every few weeks while I'm at my Grandparents' house on Sunday morning, they are reading the paper and recognize someone from the obits. "Oh look Bob, Eda May (or Ruth, or Agnes, or Opal because they all have old-fashioned names) passed away from lung cancer." Then it's "Remember when...she was the one that played violin with me in orchestra...she married George who worked out in the area...they have three kids...she volunteered with the Red Cross..." and they sit in remembrance. It's a normal occurrence at this age to run across past acquaintances in such a way. Sometimes they attend the funeral. Sometimes they send flowers. I see it happen way more frequently than I'm comfortable with at this point.

I remember the first time someone from my high school died. It was my senior year and the home ec teacher got a special announcement to read to the class. I asked if it was related to graduation which was right around the corner. She said "No, it's bad." I couldn't fathom what could be so bad- cancelled senior sleepout due to lack of security or something. One of the girls that had attended our school for a year or so had moved recently and was unfortunately involved in a tragic car accident resulting in her death. She wasn't somebody I got along with or would associate with, but it home hard nonetheless. She was somebody's daughter, somebody's friend...and at this age it just isn't expected.

I like being in my 20's. When I read the paper I am always checking out the engagements, wedding announcements, and births. I see who went to what college and graduated to become a nurse, lawyer, psychologist. You get to see the people you thought would never get married find the love of their life and some are still dinking around the hometown popping out babies. You see the nerd graduated from a prestigious college and notice that he's not-so-bad looking as you once thought he was. C'mon you know you've done it!

But at a point I know the topic of conversation will inevitably turn to the declining health of my generation. It's not like it can be avoided. Numbers go up and health goes down. Someday I'll be sitting at senior bingo drinking a cup of black coffee among the little old folks and one of the ladies will say "Remember so and so, she found out she has cancer." And one of them will probably go on to tell me a story of how her daughter survived breast cancer. And one of them will probably continue to tell me the story of the most painful kidney stone of their life and how it took 3 days to pass and looked like a chunk of concrete. Then my back will start to ache and I'll pick up my cane and moan and creak as I walk to the coffee pot for a caffeinated refill which I will explain that the doctor told me I shouldn't have but I'll have it anyway. That's what life becomes about, anything that interferes with LIFE.

Will they remember me when I go? Will they look at my obit with smiles on their faces as they eat maple bars and sip herbal tea? When it's my time, I hope so. I genuinely hope so.