Hi ho continued...

"It's probably not cancerous but if it were it'd be the worst kind." says the Doc. "It's up to you if you want to have it removed."

Uh, take it off puh-lease. It's not like I'm going to miss it! Test that thing and get back to me ASAP because it's been like 3 years since I noticed it was changing and I've put it off. I know, my bad? Surgery in 1 week. Results to follow.

By the numbers on my little test, I fall somewhere just above moderate depression. I feel like in some way I've failed. I am supposed to be happy because I have what I think others see as a happy little idealistic home life (reiterate marriage, 3 kids, house, minivan, SAHM, etc. etc. etc.) I guess I'm just glad I finally set my gloom out on the table. I have another little label to add to my warnings. SUFFERS FROM MODERATE DEPRESSION. My choices are counseling, exercise, or medicine- all of which I'm told have similar results. I'm the medicine minimalist so I'm trying an exercise regime, husband watches the kids while I workout- doctor's orders! Do you know how hard it is to find the motivation to exercise when you are depressed? I told them that too.

Got bloodwork done today as well. Checking my thryoid, my iron, who knows what else but they took 3 vials from me. C'mon good blood. They don't call you A+ for nothing!

Could my unhappiness in marriage be largely stemming from this, or did an unhappy marriage CAUSE this? Must ponder.